Every day, more and more people are fixated on appearances, chasing after fleeting trends and seeking validation through external means. 

What should define a person’s worth lies in their character – the essence of their moral values, integrity, and compassion.

Great character is the backbone of a great life, family, and, ultimately, a better world.

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Making the conscious decision to prioritize character instead of charisma is crucial for personal growth and building a more compassionate and harmonious society.

The Allure of Charisma

Charisma is undoubtedly magnetic, drawing people towards individuals who exude charm, confidence, and allure. These people (for example, former President Bill Clinton and Prime Minister Justin Trudeau) often can command attention effortlessly and leave a lasting impression on others. 

Charismatic people can be captivating, making them desirable as friends, partners, or leaders. However, charisma can sometimes be deceptive, masking underlying qualities that may not align with genuine moral principles.

The Seduction of Superficiality

With social media and the constant exposure to highly edited and curated content, superficiality has become a prevalent aspect of modern life. 

We are constantly bombarded with images of “perfect” bodies, luxurious lifestyles, and material possessions, creating an insatiable desire to attain such standards. 

This obsession with superficiality has created a culture where looks and external attributes have taken precedence over substance and inner virtues.

The Power of Character

On the other hand, character embodies the core values that shape an individual’s actions and decisions. Integrity, honesty, empathy, and resilience are essential to a strong character. 

Choosing character over charisma leads to a more authentic and fulfilling life, enabling you to build meaningful and lasting connections based on trust and genuine respect.

Why you should Prioritize Character

1. Lasting Impact: Charisma may capture attention momentarily, but character leaves a lasting impact on individuals and communities. People with solid character become beacons of inspiration and serve as role models for others.

2. Personal Growth: Cultivating good character involves self-reflection and a commitment to continuous improvement. When you prioritize your character development, you can embark on a journey of personal growth and self-discovery.

3. Meaningful Relationships: Choose character over charisma. You will foster more profound and meaningful relationships. True friends and companions value authenticity and emotional connection over superficial attributes.

4. Ethical Leadership: This is a world where influential leaders influence society significantly. Leaders with strong character are not perfect BUT are likelier to make ethical decisions that benefit the greater good rather than succumbing to self-serving pursuits.

5. Contributing to Society: People with good character often engage in acts of kindness and selflessness, and instead of thinking only of themselves, end up contributing positively to their communities and creating a ripple effect of compassion and empathy.

Avoiding or Overcoming the Charisma Trap

We must engage in self-awareness and challenge societal norms that promote superficiality. Make a hard stop and shift the focus from charisma to character. 

The following are a few practical steps to help you prioritize character:

1. Self-Reflection: Take time to assess your values, strengths, and areas for growth. Identify your core beliefs and align your actions with these principles.

2. Surround Yourself with Like-Minded Individuals: Seek genuine connections with people who value character and authenticity.

3. Limit Superficial Exposure: Reduce exposure to, or eliminate for a time or permanently, if possible, media that promotes superficiality and negative self-comparisons. (Facebook, Tiktok, Instagram, and the likes)

4. Practice Empathy: Put yourself in others’ shoes, genuinely seeking to understand their experiences and emotions—volunteer for organizations that need your skills but don’t have the economics to pay.

I get it. We live in a society that, more often than not, glorifies charisma and superficiality—BUT instead, do a hard stop and decide to choose, for example, any of the following: honesty, self-sacrifice, loyalty, accountability, and self-control. 

More so today than in the past, Character is a courageous act of defiance.

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We can lead more fulfilling lives by prioritizing authenticity, empathy, and integrity and contributing positively to our communities. Together let’s challenge the status quo and forge a path toward a world that celebrates character over charisma, where genuine connections and meaningful relationships always take precedence over appearances and fleeting allure.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost 1874 – 1963